I read an article in a Philippine newspaper, 'The Philippine Daily Inquirer', the other day about US Peace Corps volunteers being awed with the Filipinos' hospitality. One volunteer, Shashank Iyer, could not believe how his host family went out of their way to borrow a videoke machine and prepare Bicol express with tofu, ginataang puso ng saging, and vegetable curry for his birthday. His host mom, Cherry Daniel, even took quick lessons on how to cook vegetarian dishes for her new son. For the other volunteers, they said it was an experience of warmth and friendliness in our country, removing all fears of terrorism that tainted the image of the nation. And with the help of the smiles of our people, they saw the Philippines as a haven of many good hearts and yes, a great supply of hospitality.
The Filipino's hospitality to guests, I believe, comes from their generosity. And this generosity they show when they are in the country, and also when they are not. There are many heroic tendencies in the stories I have heard: A caregiver who did not want to leave Lebanon when there was a war because the old man she took care of was to end up alone if she did. So when the people from the Philippine Embassy was there to pick up our Filipinos, she chose to stay with the old man. Another story I remember is one that a friend shared and had taken from 'YouTube'. It was about the singing nurse Dominic Limpin. Dominic is a dialysis nurse in the US, and he goes the extra mile of care for his patients. He sings and dances for them. He makes sure he brings with him a song that will help not just the recovery of one's body, but more than that, the happiness of each soul. He believes this joy he has will help the healing process. And it seems the patients believe this with him, since they always would ask for the singing nurse. The willingness to give and share may be a trait many of our people have. Thus, making them quite heroic in attitude and character. One person that comes to mind as I write is a dear friend of mine, TJ Enriquez Smith. She also was a dialysis patient before her family finally found a compatible kidney for her. But before the operation, she went religiously to see the doctor to have them filter and clean her blood. And as she waited with all the other dialysis patients, she, being in pain herself, went around to give support and talk to the others who felt hopeless. "Kaya natin 'to. Hwag kayo mawawalan ng pag-asa (We can do this. Don't lose hope)." She would say, and tell them stories or be goofy with them just to keep their spirits high. She also allowed new nurses to practice on her since none of the patients wanted these new nurses to treat them. "Nagkakamali sila tapos ang sakit kasi mali yung nai-injeksyon nila, wala sa ugat. Pero paano matututo yung mga bagong nurse kung hindi sila bibigyan ng pagkakataong magpraktis (They would make mistakes and it would hurt so bad when they miss the vein. But how will the new nurses learn if no one gives them a chance to practice)?" TJ said to me once. TJ was in pain, but she continued the battle, not just for her, but also for the people she called 'classmates' in the hospital. And in return, when TJ and her family did not have enough money to pay for her visit to the hospital, her rich 'classmates' were more than willing to pay for my friend's treatment. "Basta hwag ka lang um-absent, ha (Just don't be absent, okay)?" they would tell her.
As I see it, I think somehow hospitality has become synonymous to generosity in our country, in our people. Our people, even those who have decided to work in other countries--some wanting something new, many wanting something more for their family and from life--have shared a dose of their kindness to others. Thus, becoming good representatives in showing our brothers and sisters from different nations the Filipino behavior, hopefully the behavior of many--I would like to think.
Another nurse story I heard was about a Filipina who took care of a rich old man in a coma. She talked to this rich man every day and told him stories. The day came that her contract ended and she had to come back home. So she went to his room, talked to him, and said goodbye. As a nurse, she very well knew that even when one is in a coma, this person can still hear and understand. But maybe the rich old man's family didn't know this, for they quarreled inside his room about properties and how to make him sign while he was still asleep. So when the man finally awoke, he called his lawyer and asked him to change his 'will'. He told his lawyer to look for the Filipina nurse and give her everything because she took care of him.
Now this generosity, I believe, is a trait found in the people's hospitality too. A Filipino family in the province would let guests sleep in the master's bedroom while the owners of the home sleep on the couch or mats for the night. If you pass people during lunch time and you catch them eating, they would ask you to eat with them and say, "Kain tayo (Let's eat)!" It does not matter if they know you or not, people will just offer their lunch to you. I remember a friend of mine who looked out the window of a building while we were in the second floor, he saw the mechanics of the shop beside this building eating, one mechanic saw him, and so he shouted, "Kain (Let's eat)!" "Sige lang. Kumain na ako (It's okay. I've eaten)!" Also a reminder to foreigners, if a Filipino asks you to eat with them, I noticed the security guards always do during lunch time when you enter the building they work for, it still would be better to politely say 'no', since usually the food they have is just right for them. Nonetheless, they will still share with you their food if you take them in their offer because they will be too shy to say, "I was just being polite."
Another fascinating quality of generosity is giving away things one own because the other likes it. I told my cousin once that I liked her bracelet, she removed it and gave this bracelet to me. My aunt told her friend that she thought her bag was lovely, her friend took all her things out of the bag and gave this to my aunt. I remember reading once in the newspaper about Rob Schneider, a Hollywood actor whose mother is a Filipina, saying, "What I have learned in the Philippines as a kid is to never tell my relatives that I like their stuff. I told my aunt that I liked her painting on the wall, so she took it off the wall and I went home with a new painting." And on the side of hospitality is of course the great smiles. Josh Hartnett came to the Philippines to shoot a movie. He did not mind the not very fancy hotel he was booked in. He still enjoyed his stay because he said he liked the people. I read that he would wake up very early and stay on the porch to wave and say 'good morning' to everyone. He said it was a delight to see total strangers wave and greet him back. He treated his new Filipino friends to a little party of lechon and beer on his last day.
This nice trait of ours is quite known already that we have been called the best resource of our country--the people. Though this may seem like such an over-patronizing entry, I think it is but right for us to be reminded of our good side. We do have our not so good traits, but maybe if we instill it in ourselves and not to ever forget this positive characteristics people from other nations have reputed us with, and that we do indeed have, we shall choose to improve and continuously develop this better side of us. For us not to be disheartened with the storms of bad behavior our fellow Pinoys have exposed to others: The hostage taking of foreigners and the Maguindanao massacre have made us held our heads low, shamed by these inhumane acts, making us somewhat feel unworthy. But if we never forget that there is goodness in us, that we are more kind than brutal, then maybe we could help our country more. Maybe we could be the walking reminder to others that we, the people, are indeed the best resource the Philippines has.
In my old blog site, someone asked if I could put my sources. So here is a couple of links where I got my information from:
The Singing Nurse:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mqf9c52ib9U
US Peace Corps Volunteers in the Philippines:
http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/inquirerheadlines/nation/view/20110104-312411/US-Peace-Corps-volunteers-cant-get-over-awe-of-Filipinos
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