Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 21: “Have Mercy” (Inspired by Conrado de Quiros’ article today (August 18, 2011: “Still, ‘awa’ ”)

               ‘Awa’, this word was part of Conrado de Quiros’ title for the day in his column, and I chose to ponder on the same sentiment. This, in the English language, means sympathy for others or mercy. Now the challenge for me right now is to be able not to mince Conrado’s words with mine. His words are his, and I will see what I can come up with by using mine.

                The Filipino behavior is kind and forgiving in nature. Although I do believe that this forgiving quality is a strong point of the Filipino, in my opinion, this quality is also our flaw. While reading Conrado’s article, I could not help but give approving nods in parts where he stressed the Pinoy’s ‘awa’ factor. Filipinos were brought up in a Catholic/ Christian environment, so it seems to me that even though we are not one in this faith, since majority of the people belong to this faith, its influence had rubbed off to the culture itself. Thus, having the similar definition on how to handle forgiveness and mercy.

In the Filipino community, forgiveness to those who have wronged us is very much integrated within our system that the end result is usually forgetfulness. In all this exchange I get myself into regarding issues of all sorts, I find this statement taken by the bible—“Let the man who has never sinned cast the first stone.” –as a recurring remark of others to defend their stand. In my view, this line has been somewhat misinterpreted in essence. Mary Magdalene was judged for being a prostitute. She was judged for being who she was. And this may be in line with someone who has AIDS or someone who did drugs. They are judged. But the difference is they did not do anything to directly hurt us. They did not treat us badly and they did not offend us in any way; but the people I  refer to, such as the corrupt officials, did. These people have treated us harmfully and in a very hurtful manner: they steal from us, they oppress us, and they disrespect us. And here we are, when we see them suffer a little, ‘awa’ outpours and everything is forgiven.

                 I remember when Mr. Joseph ‘Erap’ Estrada was jailed after EDSA 2, suddenly a somber mood filled the air and everyone, or almost everyone, went “Kawawa naman (Pity him). ” when he was finally arrested, rethinking if we should really put the former president behind bars and in such a sorry state. After a few years, the rage that turned into pity transformed into forgiveness, and finally forgetfulness. And this enabled Mr. Estrada to run again and almost win the presidential seat. He finished number 2 in the race.  

Then there was Mr. Angelo Reyes who was called by the Senate for questioning. He was scrutinized and badgered. A shock came to the country when suddenly he committed suicide. Everything was forgiven, after a little while, again, everything was forgotten. Amnesia spread all over the country that he was even buried at the “Libingan ng mga Bayani”. I do not believe in mocking the dead, but to be given so much honor to someone who died with corruption still connected to his name, at least in allegation, should have been buried quietly by family and close friends—a private burial should have sufficed. Just like a friend of my sister said, “Angelo Reyes’s suicide can not be defined as a heroic act and should not be seen as ‘hara kiri’. Hara kiri is a Japanese practice, and we are not Japanese.” And as someone born and raised a Catholic, Mr. Angelo Reyes himself may have not perceived his own doing as an act of bravery, but a surrender to cowardice. I respect him as a human being, but I believe the probing of his connection to corruption should not end with his death.

Next is the gentlemanly move of Mr. Miguel Zubiri. Never in Philippine history did a senator resign when hunches of anomaly surrounded his being an elected official. I look up to what he did. But after a few days, I saw a paid ad in the newspaper praising too much the honorable act, and suddenly I doubted the man and his sincerity. For it is displays like these that makes me think: “Are you taking advantage of our ‘awa’ behavior to win you some ‘pogi’ points?” It has happened then, it is not far from possible for these things to happen again.

Then there is the former President Gloria M. Arroyo, also known as GMA. St. Lukes Hospital is where she runs to when called for questioning by the Senate. She may be in a serious condition, and she may be suffering from physical pain; but it is not far from my thoughts that she might be hoping to bank on our ‘awa’ trait to forgive, and eventually forget her wrongdoings such as taking us as fools by sucking us dry.

So the ‘awa’ behavior, or the sympathy we have for others is a good trait, but also a bad one. This sympathy should be for those whom we have judged. But mercy for those who have wronged us gravely and who have chosen to strip us off our dignity, well, to forgive them—maybe, in time; to forget what they did to us—never.

Conrado de Quiros' article : http://opinion.inquirer.net/10151/still-'awa'

Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 20: SONA

Sa kadahilanan na mabilis kasi akong mabato,

Tula naman ang aking ihahanda para sa inyo.

Ito ay kahit papaano ay aking susubukan

Subali’t isang mahusay na makata ay siguradong ‘di ko matutularan.

Ang SONA ay aking napusuang pagmasdan

Sapagkat ito’y isang talumpati na tunkol sa ating bayan.

Ikinuwento ng Pangulo ang ating estado

Pati na rin ang 10 milyong kape para sa  taga PAGCOR, na malamang mga dilat pa ang mga ito.

Ipinakilala rin niya sa taumbayan ang bago nating Ombudsman.

Isang maprinsipyong babae na problema sa korupsyon din ang ipapasan.

Si Justice Conchita Carpio Morales ang kanyang  magandang pangalan.

Isang babae na may integridad at hinahangaan.

Maliban pa dito ay ang iba’t ibang proyekto

ang kanyang isinaad na kanilang iuunlad.

Isa na rito ang pantawid pamilya na pondo

At ang monorail transit na kanila’y binubuo.

Naisama rin sa kwento ang buwis na ine-eskapo

ng ibang mga negosyante, doktor at abogado.

P5,783 lang daw kada taon ang binabayad nila sa gobyerno.

Aba’y daig papala sa ‘minimun-wage’ ang kinikita ng mga ito.

Nakakalunkot din ang aking nabusisi,

 Isang doktor ay siya ring naninilbi

Ngunit pagdating sa singilan ang P1,000 naging P1,120

Sa kadahilanan lang na ang pasyente ay resibo’y hinihingi.

Aba’y ngayon ko lang nalaman

Na may presyo na pala ang kanilang sinusulatan.

Isang simpleng papel na dapat talaga ay tayo’y bigyan

Kung kaya’t isang salita na lamang ang na buntunhininga sa mga ganyan.

Naman…

Syempre maraming doktor at abogado ang dapat tingalaan

Kung kaya’t sana ang mga baluktot ay hwag isira ang kanilang pangalan.

Tama na ang praktis ng ‘tax-evading’

Upang sa gayo’y ang bansa natin ay malayo ang mararating.

Kung anu-anong struktura na lamang ang ginagawa ng aking tula.

Sana’y hindi magalit ang mga tunay na makata

Ngunit ito’y itutuloy ko hanggang buo na ang kwento

Tunkol sa napagmasdan ko sa SONA ng ating Pangulo.

Ang SONA ni PNoy ay isa lamang paalala

Na tayo’y mga Pinoy ay kailangan ng ating bansa.

Ngunit kung siya lang aasahan, mahihirapan ipabago.

 Dapat tayo’y magkaisa sa matuwid na daan na ito.

Maraming pang nakahain

Marami pang dapat gawin

Ngunit para tayo’y sumulong

Positibong ugali raw ay makakatulong.

Kung kaya’t tayo na

Ika nga nang aking nabasa

 Tama na ang sigaw na ‘Ibagsak!’

‘Itayo!’ naman ang ating ibandera.

Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 19: 'Signs'

                If one may go around and take a stroll around the flatlands, or even the mountainous places in the Philippines, one shall notice a community of warm hosts and friendly people. But aside from the warm bodies I take pride in as people of my race, one may also see, in the streets where we live, a composition of signs. These signs add to the color of the culture. I do not speak of the gigantic billboards one may see in main roads and highways, or the fancy establishments found in posh places, but rather the small ones that may be overlooked if it weren’t for the entertaining content it may have.  Sometimes as simple as a clean piece of white paper can do the trick, and once one reads it…it entertains.

One instance I can recall was when I was walking down a street which is quite known for their girls in bars, I saw a sign that said: ‘Wanted: GRO without experience’. I started laughing alone and hoped that I looked like I was just smiling because of the strong glare of the sun.  These signs are sometimes very direct or even emotional, some show multi-talented skills such as this very unique combination of services my friends saw:

Available Service:

Manicure/Pedicure

Hot Oil or Hair Spa

Hair Cut and Blow Dry

Rebonding or Hair Straightening

and we also do Vulcanizing

But whatever they may be, if you are not from my country, make sure to be on the lookout for these signs and get ready to be amused with my people.

Filipinos like playing the association game when naming their small businesses. Since Jollibee is known all over the country and some parts outside of it, maybe “Jolly Boy” can get a share of their customers. Then a barber thought of associating a popular old cartoon to the name of his shop: ‘Felix the Cut’, and another one named his ‘Harry Cutter’.  There are numerous shops and eateries that use this technique to lure potential customers to try their products and/or services. There is ‘Aristoback’, a little eatery found at the back of a known restaurant with the name ‘Aristocrat’.  Other names are ‘Mami Pakyaw’, a noodle house; ‘Kisame Street', a service for ceiling installation; ‘Lord of the Wings Lechon Manok (roast chicken)'; ‘Bread Pit’, an eatery; and ‘Prints Charming’, a printing shop. 

Another style would be changing the spelling of famous words or phrases such as ‘Curl Up and Dye’ for a parlor, or ‘Obeertime’ for a place where one can have a beer. Jimmy’s Shoe Repair Shop expressed compassion for your shoes: ‘I will heel you, I will save your sole, and I will even dye for you'. It is quite amusing to walk the streets of Manila, or places outside Manila, and read a variety of information in signs such as stating the obvious: ‘Our Public Bar Is Presently Not Open Because It Is Closed’. Oh. Okay, now I know… Then there is a word of caution: ‘Drive Slow and See Our City; Drive Fast and See Our Jail’. Or even a sarcastic sign: 'Gusto Mong ma Korog ang Imong Itlog? Hala! Pangihi diri (You want your balls to get electrocuted? Sure! Go pee here).' And from those who believe that every creature deserves to live: ‘Pls. Don’t Throw Your Cigarettes End on the Floor. The Cockroaches are Getting Cancer'. 

Then we go to spelling. The Philippines is a country of many accents. Maybe this is the reason why a few foreigners cannot tell exactly what a Filipino accent is since it is a variety of different tones. Some have a strong curling ‘r’ and a thick ‘p’ when they speak, while others are sweet and mellow, then there are those who interchange their short and long vowels; but whatever may be the difference in accent or pronunciation, all of these are very Pinoy—and we embrace them all.  One accent is the interchanging of the letter ‘e’ and ‘i’. So sometimes check-in will sound like chik-en, cheer will sound like ‘cher’ or cheese will be heard as ‘ches’.  This accent may be a little difficult to understand at first, but once one gets used to the interchanging of these two letters, it gets easier. But when this accent, or a different way of pronouncing words, is placed on a sign, it can, in some cases, come out with a whole different meaning. One furniture shop had a sign that said: ‘Available Here: Tables, Chairs, Cabinets, Beds (Single, Queen Size, King Size and Double Dick)’. I am quite sure they meant something else for that last bed.

There are also signs that give requests: ‘Our Aim is to Keep this Bathroom Clean—Gentlemen: Your aim will help. Stand Closer. It’s shorter than you think. Ladies: Please remain seated for the entire performance.’  And one that just states the fact: Starr Box: Yosi (cigarettes) Bad for you, Good for me—Business is Business by Steven Cigar’.

So when you are in your car or walking around, especially if you are a guest of the country, look around and read the amusing little pieces of paper posted on walls, or those cardboard and metal names of different shops and eateries, and you will discover little things about our culture—the creative sense of humor of the Pinoy, the emotional side that we pour into our signs, and the play with words we do that will make you smile. All you’ve got to look for are the signs.

  Source: 

Just Google 'Funny Filipino Signs' :-) 

Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 18: 'Jose Rizal'

150 years ago, a hero was born. In the midst of all harshness, the second son and the 7^th child of Francisco Mercado and Teodora Alonso entered the world as a Filipino.  His mother treated and loved her children equally. But as a child, she already noticed the special talents of her second son. His name, that will be forever known not only in his nation but also to be commended and honored in other countries, is Jose Rizal. His last name, Mercado, had to be removed when he entered Ateneo because of his brother Paciano’s close association with Fr. Burgos, whom the friars branded as a filibustero, beheaded together with three more priests. Filibusteros were the activists of those time, and they were branded by society as outcasts and troublemakers. And later on in his life, Jose Rizal was branded as one, too. 

The first influence in Dr. Jose ‘Pepe’ Rizal’s young life was his mother. Teodora introduced to her son the beauty of Tagalog poetry. She would lull him to sleep with the poems made in the native language. And it was through the young boy’s observation on his mother’s choices that he learned a sense of independence in thinking and reasoning. For even though the Spanish friars regarded Tagalog as mediocre and undeserving of attention, which many Filipinos that time believed and took in as true, Teodora Alonso differed from the rest and fell in love with poems from our native language. She was her own woman. And according to history, through example, Teodora molded her son, the Philippines’ national treasure, in his formative years to do the same thing and be the same way—to be a free thinker. And just like his mother, Pepe fell in love with words and its power. And this he used to express his love for country and countrymen. 

Dr. Jose Rizal was the first Asian to fight colonial power, but his greatness was eclipsed by the sensation of Mahatma Mohandas Gandhi.  Our national hero’s brilliance is not as popular as Mahatma Gandhi’s fame because the Philippines is much smaller than India. Thus, in world history, many people know more about the fight of the people of India against British rule.  But the magnitude of recognition was never the main mission of our hero. It was our equality with the Spanish brothers. It was change and reform for the Filipino people. Though not as popular, our national hero did inspire many, even Mahatma Gandhi wrote letters to his daughter, Indira, about Dr. Jose Rizal. 

Reading the life and works of Dr. Jose Rizal made me appreciate more what our hero did for our country. The love he had for the people and their right to a better life was a passion parallel to that of recent heroes such as Ninoy Aquino, and even those who live like Heidi Mendoza. So this made me wonder:  Why is it do we have so many of them, still? Hereos—I mean. Though times are much better than what our brothers and sisters of then went through. The 16^th century, which continued up to the 19^th century, hurdled our people to an existence of lower men and women. The entry of colonizers reduced many to a life of unworthiness. And this was the fight Dr. Jose Rizal had to face—the removal of oppression for the entry of independence to happen. Fast forward to the time of Ferdinand Marcos and we have Ninoy Aquino, leading the pack towards the goal of freedom. Then to the time of GMA (Gloria Macapagal Arroyo), tyranny is alive again and cruelty is back.

So I wonder, after centuries that passed, why do we still fight the same battle? But I cannot say that things did not improve for us. Of course we have our independence because our heroes of that time made sure we regained it. We have our freedom back because, again, heroes sacrificed their lives so that we may enjoy ours in liberty. And now we have living heroes such as Jun Lozada, Heidi Mendoza, and Grace Pedaca, just to name a few, who continue with ideals of making integrity flow again and corruption removed. It is nice to know that we are in company of heroes.  

But how long do we need heroes? How long do we need to wait until we realize that the job we need to take is not a responsibility of only a handful, but is a responsibility of all. That improvement and development is not the duty only of the government, or people in public office, but is the duty of all. That calamities and devastation are not needed for the hero in all of us to come out, because the hero in all of us can become a choice. It can become who we are. It can become what we are all about. We do not need to be woken up any longer, because we will be awake. All we need to do is care more. Just like what Jun Lozada said in a rally I attended then when he just came out as a witness for the NBN-ZTE case: “Sana ang laban natin para sa pagbabago ng ating bansa ay hindi galing sa galit kundi sa pagmamahal.  Pagkat ang galit ay nawawala. Pero kung ginagawa natin ito at nandito tayo dahil mahal natin ang ating bansa, kahit ano pa ang mangyari, hindi natin ihihinto ang laban patungo sa ating pagbabago ( I hope this fight we have for change comes from love, not from anger, for anger fades. But if our fight comes from our love for our country, no matter what happens, we shall continue this fight for change).”      

So it is actually good to know that we do not need someone as great as Dr. Jose Rizal for changes to happen. All we need to do now is to respect. Respect our people. This way we shall not forget them and we will help them if they need us. Respect our natural resources. This way we will think more than twice before we support or promote acts that destroy the beauty of our land. And finally, respect our country. This way we will always remember that no matter where we go, the Philippines is home. And just like any home, we need to take care of it, beautify it and protect it.

Reference: 

Rizal- Filipino Nationalist and Patriot    by Austin Coates

Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 17: "Love for Country"

In my last entry, I wrote about the Filipino's love for family. And that Filipinos would do anything for the family. This, I believe, is a good trait. But if done to the extreme, can become bad.

From what I have observed, many Filipinos love at a personal level. First would be family, second would be friends, and everything after that lands in the world of oblivion. Of course, this is not all of our fellow Filipinos, but somehow it seems like a tendency, which I do hope is a tendency of the not so many. It is definitely good that we love our family. But just like Conrado de Quiros said in his column for the Philippine Daily Inquirer last May 4, 2011: "Our excessive 'family first' mentality can also be our bane." This excessive 'family first' mentality may cause problems, for it can result to apathy outside the sheltered walls of our homes, and worse, most especially if found in politicians, may bring others to their poverty. With the 'family first' principle, dynasties are formed.  And sadly, many of  these dynasties are in public office not because they want to serve the people, but because they want to rule a mini-kingdom. They see the area they govern as theirs, and maybe us as their servants. Private armies are created to protect family members. Illegal acts are made to give the children of these politicians the best education they can get, not just in the country but  sometimes even somewhere abroad like the U.S. or the United Kingdom. Public funds is perceived as money in their personal accounts, where they can freely dip their filthy hands in and give their whole family a vacation in posh places, while the area they are called public servants lack proper service to its people.

I now remember a story of an intelligent Filipina who spoke in an international convention. She did really well that an American in this convention congratulated her. But then he asked, "I have noticed that your country has many brilliant people, but then what happened to the Philippines? Why are you struggling?" I had a similar conversation with a nice young  Korean lady, and as we tried to analyze what may be the problem, I tried to give her my translation on it, "Maybe one of the reasons might be because we are quite image conscious? We like working on our image, so the country does not become a priority." The lady looked at me and said, "We are image conscious, too, and I think that is a good trait." I did not say anything. I waited for her to continue, and so she did, "If you are really image conscious, then you should work on the image of your country. A strong country is a reflection on its people. If you belong to a strong country, other nationals will see you, the people, as strong too. So work on your country's image. Then others won't say anything anymore because they can see that you're doing well." I thought of what she said as she told me their story on how they all had to pitch in when their country was deep in debt. Gold was given, fellow Koreans worked outside of Korea with the intention to help their country in its time of need, and they did not stop until they were doing well again.  And when the country had public events, after the event, the venue was left clean. Trash to be thrown in trash bins is not a difficult task and duty if we really think about it. I thought of what she said and smiled. It was good advice.

As citizens of our country, maybe our affect as individuals will not cause a ripple in the stream. But maybe together we can contribute in change that shall matter, that shall be seen. Change that will affect lives outside of our families and circle of friends. Change that shall be felt by our countrymen, and maybe change that shall improve the state of our people and nation. I recommend the book of Alex Lacson, "12 Little Things Every Filipino Can Do to Help Our Country", as a must read for all Filipinos. This book teaches us to do simple things for the betterment of our country. Very simple things such as 'follow traffic rules', 'ask for an official receipt', and 'Buy Filipino'. It is quite sad though that there are little things that are not second nature to many of us, Filipino people. I think this just goes to show that maybe we still should continue improving our love for our country. But it is quite evident that we have improved. Unlike then when Filipinos preferred imported goods as opposed to local ones, nowadays, local goods enjoy a good share of the market, most especially  when it comes to clothes and the accessories department, I suppose. Although there are still areas like books (except for Bob Ong's books that has now overtaken the 'Harry Potter' series and 'Twilight' saga in bookstores) that need to be promoted, and hopefully supported by the people. Nonetheless, it is still a good sign that love for country is slowly being a norm in the Philippines. But we still have to follow rules.

I have noticed that in some places, the giving of an official receipt is not very automatic. I have found myself asking for receipts not all the time, but quite a few times already.

1st Experience:
Me    :  "Pwede pahinging resibo?" (May I have a receipt?)
Sales person: "Huh? Temporary nalang ha. Hwag na official." (Huh? Temporary, okay? Not an official one.)
Me    : "Hindi. Official." (No. Official.)
She gave me an official receipt together with a disapproving look.

2nd Experience:
Me    : "Pwede pahinging resibo?" (May I have a receipt?)
Parlorista: "Huh? Blow dry lang naman pinagawa mo ah. Resibo pa?" (Huh? You just had a blow dry. You still want a receipt?)
Me    : " Sumbong kita." (I'll tell on you.)
The parlorista hurriedly made a receipt after I said that.

3rd Experience:
Me     : "Pwede pahinging resibo." (May I have a receipt?)
Storekeeper: "Bakit po? Taga saan po kayo?" (Why, who do you work for?)
Me     : "Private citizen ako. Hindi ako taga-gobyerno. Bakit?" (I'm a private citizen. I'm not from the government. Why?)
Storekeeper: "Hindi wala, po. Wala, po." ( Nothing, ma'am.)

She was scared of me, thinking I was some investigator searching for tax evaders.

So in this exploration on asking for a receipt, I noticed two reactions: fear and annoyance. But I also noticed those who willingly gave me a receipt when I asked for one. Although I wish next time it would be more automatic for them. I believe I really do not need to ask for a receipt, I should just be given one. But okay, as for the moment, I shall ask for one when I am not given one.

So maybe it is time we change ourselves for the sake of our country. Just like what President John F. Kennedy of the United States of America said in his speech, "Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country." If we want corruption to end, we should not tolerate and most especially not do it. If we own a company,  a shop or a store, let us not forget to give our customers receipts. Let us avoid or totally stop using connections to get our way, let us do things the proper and legal way. Before we demand a fix from the government, maybe we should try to fix ourselves first. The late Senator Raul S. Roco said once : "When I was 20, I wanted to change the world; at 30, I wanted to change my country; at 60, I realized I wanted only to change myself." I see the truth in this quote of the late Senator. It seems like the first thing we need to pay attention to is ourselves.

I now remember a book I read in the '90s. The name of this book is 'Celestine Prophecy'. It spoke of a philosophy on the spiritual experience and spiritual evolution of man. And if I  do remember correctly, time was parted into decades in this book: the '50s to '60s was the time when people acted 'accordingly,' thus anything out of the ordinary was not fully accepted; late '60s to '70s was the introduction of freedom, which also led to the abuse of freedom since people were not very used to the idea of so much liberty in choice; then the '80s was called the economic era, people realized that freedom alone mixed with a pleasurable life was not the key to true happiness, but then maybe money was--thus, economic era emerged. Since this book was made in the '90s, the analysis ended with the '90s. It was said that the decade of the '90s was the transition period--from old ways to new. And now that we have just finished another decade, I believe that this journey for true happiness has traveled back to 'self'. And as I see it, the evolution of our thoughts has brought us back to one's self. It is the time for 'me'. We have come to recognize the importance of looking inward first before outward. And we may notice this with all the new invention and creations in the internet such as the blog, mulitply and myspace; now there is facebook and twitter. Why are they popular now? I think it is because man, and woman, are in the stage of exercising their value as an individual first before they can come out and contribute to something bigger. This, I see, is a collective choice.

Now the struggle is the ego vs soul. Self-love is understood in two ways. First is self-love using the ego. With this kind of love for self, we become highly competitive and play the numbers game. Number 1 becomes a very important number to us. Healthy competition is good, and maybe only the right amount of ego; but too much of it may lead us to jealousy, crab mentality, and even unhappiness. The second kind of love is using more of the soul. This way, we try to be the best we can be. We use words to describe ourselves not using their comparative form, but only their base form: "I am not greater, but I am great. And everyone is great with me." This way we recognize ourselves as part of a grand plan, but not the grand plan itself. This way we are aware that we are a piece of the puzzle that shall show the beauty of the whole picture, but we are not the puzzle itself. This way we know that we do our part, and after that, we need everybody else to make changes happen in this country.

This essay of course, on the whole, is just my analysis on what is. My words are my words, and my exploration is my personal observation. But if you think it makes sense--then maybe it is time. It is time to improve ourselves not only for the betterment of our country--the Philippines--but it could also  be for the betterment of the only home we know--this world we live in.


Conrado de Quiros on the Filipino Culture on Families:
http://opinion.inquirer.net/inquireropinion/columns/view/20110503-334395/Cultures
Heidi Mendoza on Public Servants using Public Funds for Personal Use:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fv7e54zx9QA
President John F. Kennedy's Speech:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VB6hLg3PRbY
An Outline of 'The Celestine Prophecy':
http://www.homestar.org/bryannan/celistin.html

Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 16: Family

I recently came back from a fun holiday trip full of activities, laughter, sentimental moments, and also emotional ones. I went up to the mountain province named Baguio with immediate members of my family and also extended relations. It was bonding time for me, and it was also a birthday celebration of my Grand Aunt whom all from the family love dearly.

And this will be my next observation--family. How important is this to the Filipino? How do we show how much we value each member? And how does this work in our culture?

The Filipino family is the main support group of the Pinoy. And this does not compose only of immediate members, but also extended ones: 1st, 2nd, 3rd degree relations. And I even know a few families, oh...I think that includes mine, that feel still very close to family members who share only a drop of blood in their veins with the other. Kamag -anak is kamag-anak no matter how distant and little the blood relation may be. And bonding is instant usually, which I believe is not a Filipino quality but a natural tendency of many families all around the globe, even with family members whom we just met.

The family, it seems, usually takes a big part from the definition of happiness in the Filipino's life. Thus, its members are the main reason why many Filipinos choose to work in a foreign nation. They are the main reason why Filipinos leave the country and work somewhere else. Majority of our OFWs (Overseas Filipino Workers) would rather stay in the Philippines. Even with the hustle and bustle of traffic, the thick pollution Manila offers to its residents and dwellers, the difficulties of every day sustenance, the Philippines is still home to many. But the salary offered to various professions and jobs in the country is usually not enough to support the children and to give the family a comfortable home. Because of this, many are forced to leave and look for better jobs abroad.  In the article I read, it was mentioned that the Filipino diaspora has overtaken the Jewish diaspora in number; since the Philippines sends out a million or more of its people, every year, overseas for work. The country is proud of its OFWs, who seem to leave an impact on their employers because they are hardworking and industrious. They are smart and can easily converse and understand  the universal language--English. But this pride we have for our fellowmen who leave the country for work, not out of choice but out of need, is also a bittersweet achievement. We call them heroes for they help the nation's economy by bringing in money. But then it is also a sad fact that they need to leave the country because we are not strong enough to take care of them back. And this they do usually with a heavy heart. This they do so they could help improve the lives of people they love--their family: the very people they wish to be with, the main reason they need to leave.

Now I go back to my personal story and speak of my Grand Aunts' beautiful  birthday celebrations, which they just had within the past few months. I had a Grand Aunt in my father's side who just turned 100, and a Grand Aunt in my mother's side who just turned 90. In the Filipino culture, the oldest member of the whole clan is the most important family member. Maybe this is how we see the word 'grand' in compound words such as Grandmother, Grandfather, Grand Aunt and Grand Uncle. 'Grand', as we all know, means magnificent. And in the dictionary, they define it as 'worthy of great respect'. And because the grandparent has the most noteworthy role, parties are usually not simple. Just like their label, it, too,  has to be a grand occasion. From ages 80 and above, parties are seldom just dinner with the immediate family, but a big bash that includes the extended members and close friends. The 100th party of my Grand Aunt was complete with giveaways, a program by the great grand children and of course food. The 90th party of my other Grand Aunt was as grand as well. There was dancing, honoring from the guests, food, and  an after party of singing with the accompaniment of the piano. Of course, songs selected were the preference of the queen--my Grand Aunt. What she wanted us to sing, we sang. And when she wanted to sing, we all became quiet as she did her solo numbers.

In both of my Grand Aunts' parties, relatives from all over the globe came home to celebrate the birthday of the most important member. This is a common practice in the Philippines, no matter how far a member is, no matter how busy one may be, the special day of the 'Grand' man or woman of the clan is an important occasion to the whole family that members will find ways to attend it. And if members cannot go, they leave messages, then those who do go will make sure that every moment and minute of the event will be a memorable one for the celebrant, as well as for the kin.  However, there are also Grandparents who do live in a 'home'. But this practice is not very usual in the Philippines since many Filipinos perceive these golden years of the grandparents as priceless.

This is the Filipino family, and just like any family, it also goes through struggles and difficulties. But the bond among its members is permanent. The love may sometimes take its about-face turn and become hate, but then it can take another 180 degree turn and become love again. There are fun times, and of course there are trying times.  Problems may occur, hurts and misunderstandings, but even  with the differences and the struggles, family will always be the main priority in the Filipino culture.

Reference:
http://globalnation.inquirer.net/mindfeeds/mindfeeds/view/20071212-106376/A_Closer_Look_at_the_Filipino_Diaspora

Exploring the Filipino Psyche Day 15: Cleanliness

Okay, it has been a while since I last explored. But here I am again and now I will write about the Filipino’s obsession on cleanliness. Well, maybe I should not call it an obsession since it is nothing near the level of the aviator Mr. Howard Hughes, where he reduced everyone to a piece of filth and isolated himself from the world since he thought it was full of germs. But this is only according to the movie ‘The Aviator’, starring Leonardo di Caprio. So I do not know how much truth was put into that version, and how much of it is only cinematic liberty. Anyhow, when it comes to the version of the Filipino way, cleanliness is a habit and a value.

Let us begin with the bath. The Filipino has a bath at least once or twice a day every day. Baths that are done two times a day are one in the morning and one again in the evening. And from what I have learned, those who take their bath once a day, which is done in the morning, take their—as it is called in the Philippines—the ‘half-bath’ before they go to sleep. A ‘half-bath’ is cleaning the face, armpits, private parts and the feet. Okay, so the ‘half-bath’ removes the upper body (chest, tummy and arms) and legs, I guess.  So, because it is a habit, if there are those who find eating rice in the morning as a breakfast meal a little strange, the Filipinos are quite surprised when they see a scene in a foreign film and the actor/actress wakes up and just changes his or her clothes. “Ay, hindi naligo (Oh...he didn’t take a bath),” is the usual remark I would hear when I watch a movie in the cinema and the character needs to rush and leave for work because he or she overslept. Thus, the character will need to skip the bath. I know someone who was once a volunteer in a remote place somewhere on the globe, and after her mission for the day, no matter how tired she may be, she would walk the distance to fill up two pails with water for her bath. The other nationals thought she was kind of strange because they were indeed very tired from the tasks and duties they were called to do at a daily basis. But being Pinoy, she just had to have that bath. And I think many of us, if not all, fully understand that.

The bath is very important to the Pinoy that when Ondoy struck and devastated the Filipino people, one of the first projects of two major networks were to put up a paligo (bath) program for the evacuees. Container vans were transformed into little shower rooms for the people and they were given soap, shampoo, and towels. The evacuees were all smiles after their bath.

This reminds me of a time when I was younger. My campus was in Los Banos, Laguna. Nowadays, the students there enjoy a mall and do walk around to do a little ‘malling’, a past time that many Filipinos also enjoy. But during my time, we did not have a mall, there was no such thing, which, I do believe added flavor to my memories of those times. What we had were trees, the campus, and simple places to go to. The most memorable place for me was our movie house. There was a little store on the corner inside the movie theatre. So if you suddenly feel hungry, all you’ve got to do is walk down the stairs and go to the lady on the corner with the dim light to buy your siopao asado or bola-bola. Thus, because of not much places to go to, and the TV of a friend had only 2 channels: channels 9 and 13, what my friends and I did for enjoyment was role-playing, ‘let’s pretend’ and alaskahan. Of course we did our share of gossiping, but gossips can get boring since it is quite pointless. And it is not really fun. So there we were making up our own stories and playing ‘pretend’. One day I entered my friend’s apartment and saw him get the soap from their bathroom and placed it on the corner of their kitchen sink. He put a small towel on his shoulder and turned on the water. He did not know that I was by the door, until, “What are you doing?” I finally asked. “Carla!” my friend shouted. “Good thing you’re here! I really need someone else to do this with me,” he said. “What are you doing, anyway?” I asked again. “ Let’s pretend we’re construction workers and we’ll wash our faces.” I guess that was how bored we were that even face-washing became an activity for us. I looked at my friend, trying to decipher where the thrill was in that. “Carla,” he continued, “ didn’t you ever wonder why construction workers can soap their faces until they’re all white and still be able to keep their eyes open, walk around and talk to their fellow workers?” he asked. “Well,” I took a pause as I tried to put logic in my answer to his question, “there are soaps that are gentle to the eyes, like ‘Dove’.” My friend looked at me with brows that furrowed and said, “I don’t think they use ‘Dove’ in construction sites.”  I saw the sense in my friend’s ‘let’s pretend’ game, so there we were, soaping away. He taught me how the movements of my hands should be as I soap. The hands should not go around they eyes, they should just go up and down over them. My friend set up the ‘Safeguard’ soap and we began:

“Ah…o kumusta ka na ba, Dong? Ow!” (How are you, Dong? Ouch!)

“OK naman ako…aray!” (I’m OK…ouch!)

We did our role-playing as construction workers as we tried to fight the pain the suds of the ‘Safeguard’ soap gave us. We found ourselves washing our eyes several times and repeating the practice, trying to keep our eyes open as long as we could while walking around and talking. After that exercise, my friend and I never looked at a construction site with construction workers soaping their faces until they were white  with the same eyes again. Not because our eyes became sore from all the soaping we did, but because we honored the talent and put a high regard to it. So there it is, even in construction sites we see big men soaping their faces while having a chat with each other. A big metal can with water as their timba, and a smaller one as their tabo. 

Next is brushing the teeth after lunch no matter where the Pinoy is, even in malls we see this. During lunch time, I like visiting the ladies’ room and listen to the little conversations our Filipino ladies have while they brush their teeth. I brush my hair and put on my powder and lipstick ever so slowly in the ladies’ room, pretending to mind my own business, focusing only on how I look in the mirror. Little do the salesladies know that I do this while listening to their interesting exchange. Usually they talk about end of contracts, their shifts, what time their vacants are, and where they will go after work (I wonder if I could still call that exploring or just plain ‘nosy’). Many employees bring their toothbrush and toothpaste to work. It is a common practice among Filipinos.

Then there is alcohol and  the not so old product, the alcogel. Filipinos bring one of these in case we need to wash our hands but there is no place to go to that has soap and water, especially because we like munching on a snack so we need to have clean hands for this.

Filipinos put a high value on cleanliness. If there is no water in an area, we will search and look for some. If we need to fall in line and wait even hours to fill up our pails with water, we will do just that. In an area where water is scarce, the nearest faucet or even the nearest body of water will do just to get that refreshing feeling a bath gives one. But maybe it would also be nice if we extend this cleanliness outside of ourselves and to our country. They do not have to be grand acts, but simple things like putting litter in litter baskets. No matter how small our trash is like a candy wrapper, it can wait to be thrown into a trash bin. It should not be placed on our streets and rivers, or the sand and seas.  Another thing we could do perhaps is help our community and our fellow Pinoys to be more conscious and do their part in keeping our streets, beaches, mountains, and bodies of water clean. Then maybe, step by step, little by little, as we do this together, our country shall remain truly ‘The Pearl of the Orient’.